Friday, March 12, 2010

Television Things That Annoy Me

This one's been coming for along time now, and really anyone thats around me more then afew minutes at a time is aware i do this, so i figured I'd sit down, and take a break from my deciding what series or movie to write up next, and do something slightly comedic, because sometimes its good to be funny..

Anyway, what I decided to do is compile a list of sorts, or all the things in television past and present the annoy me, that annoy me enough to actually vocalize it to others, be it for actual annoyance or because its just hilarious at the time being. Anyway, lets get into my list and you'll see what I mean...

The Parents On Lassie Were Horrible People And Horrible Parents:
This has to be my most common complaint actually, because it doesn't just make you wonder why Timmy's parents felt the need to entrust the guardianship and care of their pre-tween (ugh) son in the paws of an aging sheep dog, but it starts to make you wonder about other shows too, like, where Dora The Explorer's parents are, or any other number of parental neglect in television, but none, none, are more obvious and glaring case of this trend as the parents on Lassie. Its clear these parents do not care for their child, first because he is raised by what appears to be a super intelligent collie, but they seem to be neglectful of the fact that they seem to have NEVER patched up the old mine opening, or covered up that old well's opening, regardless of the fact he's even gotten stuck in, or fallen into one of those two things EVERY WEEK FOR 6 SEASONS. Honestly, what in the bloody hell is the deal with this, it bugs me still to this very day, like to the point I just scream at the television about it.

The Professor On Gilligan's Island Was Completely Useless:
This one is probably the most commonly mentioned of all of these, because its the one most people think of right off the top of their heads. For those that don't remember, Gilligan's Island is the story of seven strangers stranded on an island in the middle of the south pacific ocean, an island that apparently no one has ever noticed was there, and that those who did happen across it, never mention is there, even though each visitor mentions they're famous for being missing. Now, logic on this aside, the most glaring issue I have with this show is, The Professor, he is supposed to be the brains of this outfit, and though I admit, making a power supply out of workout bikes made out of what i guess are Bamboo and reeds, is pure genius. I still have to wonder why he didn't simply patch the 3 foot hole in the boat's hull and be on their way. It annoys me. I often find myself thinking he just wanted to stay there on teh island where everyone was stupider then him, because lord knowns none of them could think "hey we made a table out of a tree, lets fix the fucking hole in the boat with this..." right? I find that as believable as the fact they're apparently off maps, but are close enough to Hawaii to pick up radio stations clear as can be. Honestly, i think The Professor just wanted to sit around for 30 years till the Harlem globetrotters showed up.... I mean I sure as hell would have... man the way Medowlark Lemon dunked on that robot... wooo!

The Interior Layout Of Houses Do NOT Match The Exterior:
This is one of my biggest issues I have. Now I understand that you need a visual and a set and stuff for the exterior of a home, after all some scenes do take place outside of the interior setting of a home, and for that, you need an image of what the outside of the home is. Now, thats well and good, but the problem with it is this, most of the time, the lay out of the indoor floor plan, could never match the exterior look. The biggest noted example of this is on the old Jefferson's television series, where its pretty obvious by the exterior of the building, that its impossible for the Jefferson's deluxe apartment in the sky-i-i-i, to exist in that building, in reality, there would be no balcony, and where the hallway to the bedrooms and stuff are, would be a wall. This one is the shining example of what i'm saying not only for that, but also, because its impossible for Mr. Bentley's apartment next door to be where it is, there are rooms down that hallway, all big ones from what we've seen in them, that would mean Mr. Bentley would beliving in a closet (haha) or that apartment wouldn't be there at all. Its super annoying. Another example is the Banks estate on The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air, there is no possible way that in a manson that size, that kitchen and living room are that small, and right inside the front entrance to the home, like they state many times on the show it is. That would mean the house is really small with just a big impressive front, and very little else, kind of a reverse TARDIS effect, where its smaller on the inside then it is on the outside, plus the lay out of the second floor could not happen given the layout of the first.. Theer are countless other examples of this really, the house and yard in Roseanne, the house and yard on Family Matters, The house and yard on Full House that was clearly always a two floor home with an attic that magically becomes a full size third floor when they need it too, and the house and yard on The Brady Bunch, as well as countless others though off the top of my head those stick out the most. I should also note this is a strictly american issue, for other nations have realized the realism effect is important, and try to not go to far out from the outer home design.

you know, i had a really big list, but for the life of me i can't find it, so i'm just gonna leave it with this for now...and go back later for more....



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